


Just one bad day...

by carrowmetohell



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman: Arkham (Video Games), Under the Red Hood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-06
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-03-01 01:27:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13284045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carrowmetohell/pseuds/carrowmetohell
Summary: Anthology series showcasing the Joker vs Gotham's more infamous residents; with their sanity as the punchline.Each chapter will be named after the character the Joker is taunting. Tags will be updated as necessary.Chapter 1: Jason Todd/Red HoodChapter 2: Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy





	1. Jason Todd/Red Hood

Jason held his gun firm against Harley Quinn’s temple, his anger palpable in the abandoned warehouse. The black and red jester trembled within his bruising grasp, shivering as the wind howled through the abandoned docks. The Batman would not be disturbing them tonight. No one was going to hear her scream. 

They just had to wait for him to arrive and then Jason could finish this. First, he’d make the Joker watch him kill his little Harlequin and then it was his turn. Jason clenched his jaw, teeth gritted beneath his red mask. Sweat beaded on his forehead, tension building in his gut. He was ready for this. Revenge was almost his.

Harley could feel the violent energy buzzing off her captor. She had an intimate knowledge of the way a man held himself before killing or hurting another human being. Tonight was the night she died. She could feel it in her bones.

The man beneath the red hood was Jason Todd. The former boy blunder her lover had tortured and killed years ago before her time. That Robin had been killed by her Puddin’ long before she’d even graduated from Gotham University. Harley faintly remembered how horrified Harleen had been to hear what had happened to the young Robin at the hands of her clown prince of crime. This world had seemed so far away from her back then and yet here she was, a captive in the middle of a vendetta she’d played no part in.

“I’m going to kill her Joker.” Jason announced gruffly, pressing the cold gun barrel roughly against her forehead.

“You say that like it isn’t obvious kid.” The Joker replied clicking his tongue. Harley Quinn squeezed her eyes shut and whimpered. The Joker wasn’t going to save her. She’d known that from the moment Jason had captured her. Someone just needed to tell the boy.

Harley would have stood a better chance if Jason hadn’t taken Bud and Lou captive. She could have fought him, prevented him from putting her in this position. Instead she’d willingly walked into his arms to spare her babies from a bullet. She knew the Joker wasn’t going to do the same for her. 

The Jokers bright green eyes watched Jason with a composed curiosity. His eyes did not once stray to meet his terrified sidekicks gaze. “Do it.” The clown dared. He wasn’t calling Jason’s bluff. He simply didn’t care if it was one.

Jason’s eyes widened beneath his mask. “I mean it!” He grunted, pulling blonde pigtails back in a jarring motion. Harley shrieked in pain, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. The Joker’s tongue darted out to wet his scarred lips. He seemed to be enjoying the show.

“Look I don’t have all day kid,” he goaded, willing the former hero to pull the trigger.

“Stop calling me kid!” Jason roared, pulled the gun back and fired off a shot into Harley’s shoulder point blank. The bullet must have shattered her collar bone. She screamed in agony, collapsing at his feet in tears. The Joker didn’t flinch, he just smiled that all-consuming smile that seemed to swallow the world.

The last smile Jason saw before he died.

Jason dropped the gun and the girl, stumbling backwards and clutching his head as if he could will the images away. In a single moment he had been reduced to the scared little boy the Joker had kidnapped all those years ago. He shook violently, rage and fear consuming his being.

Months had gone into this plan only to have it ruined by him. He had come here with the full intention of killing the jester girl, but it was obvious to him now that the Joker couldn’t care less if she lived or died. 

Jason had been sure he must have cared for Harley. Why would he go through all that trouble just to-just for her to- No. It didn’t make sense. Hands trembling with rage, Jason clenched his fists. 

“What is wrong with you?” He screamed, throat raw and hoarse. 

“I’d tell you to ask my shrink but I don’t think she wants to talk to you right now.”

With that, Jason roared. Charging forward towards the Joker in a blind rage. The Joker didn’t even bother to side step the attack. He allowed the Red Hood to tackle him to the floor and began laughing once fists pummelled his face.

“Call that a punch kid?” The Joker laughed, spitting blood and a tooth out. “No wonder your Bat-dad left you to die.” Jason screamed and hit him again, his fists a frenzied flurry. 

At least until Batman stopped him. 

Even with his face a bloody mess, the Joker didn't skip a beat with delivering his final line.

"Rough day kid?"


	2. Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy

It wasn’t often that the Joker was allowed in the communal room. See, he had a history of abusing the privilege. In all honesty it was a wonder he’d even been considered to return to Arkham. The people of Gotham often found themselves wondering why he hadn’t just been shipped out of state or to some island in the middle of nowhere. Banished like some modern-day Napoleon.

The Joker knew it was because Batman couldn’t bear to live without him.

Frankly, that leather-clad sadist belonged in there with him.

But today wasn’t about the Bat or even Gotham. It was about someone that was locked up in Arkham with him as much as he was locked up with her and his plan was just about to come to fruition. 

Recently, the Joker had been on his best behaviour for the past couple of months. He had resided in Arkham peacefully and without incident. The Joker had even attended his sessions with Hugo Strange with a certain open candidacy that made the good doctor feel like they had a special connection.

Today he had been granted the privilege to return to the resident’s communal lounge. It didn’t hurt that Frank Boles had told everyone that the Joker had complied absolutely with all his instructions during his most recent stay. A truth that could have more to do with the fact that Frank’s palm had been handsomely greased by the Jokers boys outside of Arkham.  
Bribes always got you far in Arkham, the guards just classed it as their hazard pay. But it was an old tactic of the Joker’s… If he was honest, he’d been kind of disappointed that it had been so easy.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. 

They were all idiots. 

The Joker clenched his jaw sharply. That kind of thinking made him sound like the Riddler. Maybe he’d have to pay Edward Nygma a visit next. However, today he had plans for a different green fiend entirely. 

The Joker waltzed into the room, hands trapped in sewn pockets. It made the guards feel more at ease when his hands were restrained by something, even a superficial piece of cloth. Out of sight out of mind or something equally redundant. They clearly didn’t realise he could do far more damage with his hands covered than he could with them out in the open. 

It didn’t take him long to locate his target. Poison Ivy was sitting in her usual spot. She always sat alone on the beat-up sofa watching some crap nature documentary. No one dared disturb her when she watched her shows. She always had a distinct, empty buffer zone around her.  
Unless a certain pigtailed jester was also institutionalised and that was exactly the problem.

A smile slid its way onto the Jokers greasepaint free face and he grabbed the sofa back behind Ivy.

“Where’s my darling girl?” The Joker asked Ivy, feigning shock as if her absence deeply surprised him. He slunk down on the sofa next to her in a fluid movement.

“Like I’d tell you anything.” The green woman bit back.

“Did she not get caught with you?” He continued with a pout, “oh I’d really hoped she would be. I really have missed the girl something terrible.”

Batting his hand in a dismissive fashion, he rounded the sentiment off with a shrug. “Ah well, I bet she left you the minute your job went bust! Bet she’s moping around my hideout sorry that she can’t find me.”

“Oh, what do you know clown?” Ivy’s attempt at a retort didn’t carry her normal fire. “Go bother someone else.”

The Joker leapt over the sofa and landed with a thud next to her. The atmosphere in the room grew thick as a palpable tension formed between them. The Joker continued as if he hadn’t noticed a thing, though he was careful to keep aware of the guard’s positions. 

“I bet she’ll get herself thrown back in here just to be with me.” The Joker shrugged nonchalantly before shooting her a side glance. “Far more than she’ll ever do for you green bean.”

Ivy scoffed, unwilling to deal with the man beside her. He provoked a deep-rooted anger within her that reminded her of Professor Wilson. Men were all the same she thought acidicly. Ivy clenched her jaw, sitting woodenly on the decrepit sofa. 

“Oh, she tries so hard.” He continued, batting his hand in the air. He’d always known he was going to have to work a little to get a reaction. He just needed to press the right buttons and get her hooked into his narrative. Knowing Ivy it was only a matter of time before she bit.

“She tries to be exactly what you need before you need it – when you need it. I know. I made her that way. But you, you eat it right up. You take advantage of her and you can’t even admit it to yourself. That’s what’s so damn funny about this. I-” Before The Joker could continue Ivy jumped to interrupt him.

“I protect her from what you do to her!” Ivy snarled, her grip on the television remote threatening to destroy it. She remained seated, unwilling to get herself thrown out of the communal room because he was taunting her. That was probably exactly what he wanted. She refused to give him the satisfaction.

“You protect her?” He scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Face it. You get off on her tears and bruises as much as I do sweetheart.”

“You’re the real monster here Pamela. You want to own her, but you pretend you don’t. At least I’m honest with the girl.”

The Joker sat back again, flitting between animatedly articulating his points and relaxed indifference. The display would have been jarring for anyone unfamiliar with him. 

“I reckon that’s the real reason she’ll never choose you over me.” The Joker leaned forwards, whispering the next line. “That and she just loves the way I can make her scream.”

Ivy baulked at that a sickly feeling clawing at her insides. Was he right about her? About Harley?

“She’s a weed Ivy and you’re going to pull her out of the ground long before I do.”  
Ivy’s mouth was dry. “What?” She questioned incredulously. 

“You see, that’s what’s really funny about all this. I threaten to kill her all the time. And sure I’ve wanted to but something has always held me back. You on the other hand. I can see it in your eyes Pamela. You’re a stone cold killer.”

“I-I would never.” Sure, Ivy recognised that she had a temper but that was unfathomable. She’d never hurt Harley- twisted memories flashed through her mind. Barbed words and restraining grasps. Ivy had tried to stop Harley from leaving her apartment twice before but that wasn’t the same – it couldn’t be the same. 

The Joker gave Ivy a moment to pale before he prodded again. 

“Well wait until you hear what she did in Gotham Park.”

Ivy paled further. “She wouldn’t.” The words were barely a whisper. The fact The Joker even knew that Central Park was a place of interest to her said it all. Harley had helped Ivy to build a garden of rare and beautiful plants that wouldn't normally bloom in Gotham's harsh climate.

Ivy had poured her heart and soul into the display. Harley knew how much it meant to her. Even telling the Joker about felt like a violation but Ivy held onto the hope that it meant nothing-that this was nothing more than a cruel ruse. 

“Turn on the news and find out.” The Joker challenged and relaxed back into his seat as if they were about to tune into a brand-new cinema release. Ivy's throat burned. The air was thick with anticipation. With the rooms eyes glued to the television screen Ivy changed the channel with shaking hands.

It was her turn to scream as she watched the park burn.


End file.
